- We need more space for when baby #2 comes along
- Ben has almost an hour commute each way
- My parents (aka our babysitters) live over an hour away
- The ward we are in is crazy and I've had repeated nightmares about certain ward members kidnapping Sadie from nursery
- I miss being close to the beaches
- The schools up here scare me and there is NO WAY I'm sending Sadie to one of them
However, we received devastating news last week from a lender that if we want to get out of this house we would have to do a short sale. That's not an option for us. So, therefore, I feel stuck and frustrated.
But I keep repeating in my mind a line from a YW's lesson I remember from my youth: bloom where you are planted. So, that's my new motto. I'm trying not to dwell on how life would be so lovely to live 5 minutes from Ben's office and see him everyday for lunch and have an additional two hours a day with him and be able to accept help with Sadie on Sunday from people I trust and be able to go on dates every weekend and get Sadie in a really great preschool and find a bigger home to accommodate our growing family. No! I'm not dwelling on that!
Instead I'm asking myself: What good can I do in this sad city of Hudson? What can I do to help strengthen some of the ward members that scare me, so that they won't frighten me as much? How can I help the youth in this area make better choices and encourage them to get an education? Are we making the meager amount of time we have together as a family as meaningful, memorable, and happy as possible?
I'm trying to enjoy all the open space, great parks, and good people up here (because there are a lot of good people, too). Also, we do love our home and with a little ingenuity it's plenty big enough for another person. And surely one day, when we are able to move, it will be very sad to leave. So, I'm trying my best to thrive and count my blessings; I'm accepting my fate and trying to make the best of it. Pray for my success, please!!
7 comments:
What an incredible attitude to have, Alicia. I know the Lord will bless your righteous desires. Love reading your insightful posts :)
Good luck Alicia! I certainly know how it feels to feel "stuck." It's frustrating to feel so antsy to move when you know you can't. So, you're smart to focus on the positives. It's not easy, but makes all the difference. Good luck!
I definitely needed to read your post..as I have been feeling this way too but for other reasons..I love that motto, "bloom where ye are planted"..thanks for the inspiration Alicia..you are the best :)
I love your new positive attitude and am thankful for your post. Sometimes when I want things I can't really have right now (like a house, new car, ect), I just tell myself that this isn't the time for those things yet. I love your quote and will use it in times of need also :)
Oh Alicia I'm so sorry that you have come to be in the Hudson Ward! It seriously is a pretty crazy ward.(It's amazing I came out unscathed:) But I know there really are some wonderful people in it...You really do have an awesome attitude. For me, when I feel stuck in a not so great ward I always think, "how is a not so great ward able to become a great ward?" and it's by having strong members move in and help it along. I know that's what you are doing. Good luck, I know everything will be alright:)
Alicia, I really enjoy reading what you are thinking about. This is where the philosophical side comes out and it is interesting to read it. It will work out. You make a difference where you are. You may not be there for you, but someone else.
Dad
LOVE this post! LOVE IT. I have this thought quite often, and I try my little heart out to be positive, but then my natural, negative self comes out and I'm all Debbie Downer-face again.
I think I'm going to plant a tree that symbolizes my wanting to thrive where ever I'm "planted."
Except I'd have to get approval from the HOA board... Eh, too much effort.
Sad face.
Post a Comment